As promised, this is the option I went with for the story I posted about in my last entry:
"Hey, so, I don’t think I’m
going out tonight,” he texted.
“Oh?
Why?”
“Just
not feeling it.” I knew he was going through a rough patch.
“Okay.
Well you want me to come over? Just chill. Night in?”
“No.
Go out.” I wasn’t about to leave him sitting at home, alone, moping. I got
undressed and threw on a tee and baggy jeans; I didn’t need a dress for a movie
night. I washed my face to rid myself of the mask I’d drawn on earlier and
replaced in with a natural look. O grabbed my leather jacket and keys and put
on my worm- out sneakers.
On
my way to campus I stopped and grabbed chips, dip and pop. When I got off the
bus in front of the library it had started to rain, just a light drizzle. I
walked quickly to Dante’s Building. When I got to his floor the door was
propped open so I let myself in. I walked down the hall to his room and knocked
on the door.
When
he opened it there was something wrong. He didn’t say anything, his jaw dropped
and he kept the door mostly closed. “Hey,” he said finally, uncertainly.
“Hi.”
“What are you doing? Shouldn’t
you be out at the club?”
“I figured you were here
moping so I thought I grabbed some snacks and came over.” I pushed the door
open to walk in. It was my turn for a jaw dropping experience. The room was
dark, and then lightning flashed and illuminated what was on the table: a
needle, a spoon, an elastic and a small bag.
I dropped the bag. I looked
back at Dante who just stood there, watching and waiting for my reaction. I
walked over to a chair and sat abruptly. I put my elbows on my knees and my
head in my hands. He approached me slowly, cautiously. He stretched out his
hand to put it on my shoulder.
“No!” I said. He recoiled and
retreated. There was another moment of silence.
“Deirdre?” he said in a quiet
voice. “Deirdre, can you say something?” I looked up. He was sitting across the
room, on the floor, in a corner, pulling his knees to his chest.
“Honestly Dante, I’m not sure
what to say.” He went to speak but I shushed him. “I mean, I’m not sure what to
say or what to feel. I’m confused. I’m scared. I’m worried. I don’t know why
you’d share everything else with me but keep this a secret. I don’t know if I
should get out now before I get pulled into it. I don’t know if I should try to
help. Would you even accept my help? I really don’t know what to say, so how
about you say something?”
“Umm, I—" he looked up
with tears in his eyes. “I don’t know what to say. I’m just as confused and
scared and worried as you are. I’m confused as to why you are still here. I’m
scared that I’m going to take this too far. I’m worried that I’m going to drag
you down or lose you. But Deirdre, if you’re willing to stay and you’re willing
to help, I’ll take all the help I can get. I’ve gotten myself into some bad
shit. Its—" I was sobbing now, his head on his knees. “It’s really bad, Deirdre”
he said, muffled.
I got up and went to sit
beside him against the wall. I put my arm around him. He laid his head on my
shoulder, crying. I wiped the tears from his face.
“Of course I’ll help. You know
that. I’m just shocked and I never thought, after all you’ve told me, that
there was anything you’d hide from me.”
His sobbing had ceased. He
looked up to me, his eyes bloodshot and glossy. “Deirdre, I was too ashamed. I’ve
somewhat come to terms with everything else. But this—" he closed his
eyes, straining not to cry, straining to talk. “This is different. I know that
its bad but I’m in too deep. I’m ashamed that I ever let myself fall prey to
the drugs. My mind was at a different place then and even though it’s different
now I can’t get away.”
I held him tight against my
chest, like you would a child. “You’ve already taken a huge step tonight. You’ve
admitted you have a problem and you’re seeking help. And I promise I’m going to
help you. Anything you need, any time.”
Please leave comments below on what you think. your thoughts mean the world to me! thanks in advance :)
